


elegy for the boy in black

by seatoriver



Series: where do winter crows go? [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Violence, Persona 5: The Royal, alternative 2/2, ps morgana's such a bro man, spoilers for third semester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:41:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24974737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seatoriver/pseuds/seatoriver
Summary: Somewhere in the midst of the moment, the two imagined a life with the other, one where they were all the happier. Akira thought that if he wished hard enough, maybe the moment wouldn't have to end at all. That he could just stay in Akechi's arms forever. But he knew it was just wishful thinking. Sometime soon, one of them will have to let go and Akira wasn't sure he wanted to be the first to do so.(Alternative 2/2 Scene for Persona 5 Royal, after Akechi's third awakening)
Relationships: Akechi Goro & Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro & Persona 5 Protagonist, Akechi Goro/Amamiya Ren, Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: where do winter crows go? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1873036
Comments: 4
Kudos: 82





	elegy for the boy in black

"Akechi, wait!" Akira hurries out the door of Leblanc, just in time to catch Akechi halfway down the street.

He had his hands in his pockets, a stiff look on his face. If he wasn't overthinking it, it looked a lot colder than he did when they talked earlier about Maruki's deal.

"What is it?" Akechi asks, his voice low. "I don't have all night, you know. I still need to prepare for tomorrow."

Something inside Akira snapped, as it did earlier when the detective had called his life a "trivial" matter. "Look, can't that wait? This is your _last_ night, Akechi. I just―I can't just…"

Shit, if he could only find the words to convey what he felt. If only he wasn't so afraid.

"Yes, you can. You can handle this, Akira." Akechi says harshly, sauntering over to jab a finger to his chest. "I won't let you back out now. We made a deal, right? So, you better hold your end of the bargain till the bitter end. Now, you're going to let me walk away and I won't hear another word of your mindless hesitation."

"No, just listen to me!" Akira grabs his wrist, taking Akechi by surprise. "It's because it's your last night that I can't just let you go like this. It just feels wrong."

"I don't―"

" _Please_ , Akechi, I'm not going to back out of the deal. I swear." He's pleading now, holding the other's hand with two of his own, almost as if in prayer. "So, can't you stay longer for a bit? Or… actually, won't you stay over tonight?"

Akechi gave him a once-over, scrutinizing him but he didn't attempt to let go of his hand. "Why in the world would I do that?"

"Because…" He found it hard to get the words out. "I still have so much to say. Don't you?"

The two stood there for a bit in silence. Akira could see Akechi mulling over his words before his expression softened a little, his eyebrows relaxing. He sighs, shaking his head a little before slowly pulling his hand away from Akira. "You really are…" he mutters, trailing off.

Akira only looks at him expectantly, waiting before Akechi seemingly regains his composure and nods his head at him. "Well, what are we standing around for? It's freezing as hell here."

Akechi heads back into the store as Akira flips the Open sign to Closed before locking the door behind him. The detective was already sitting by the countertop, his beige trench coat hanging behind the stool. He had his hand resting on his chin, his eyes closed. Akira lets him be and checks the fridge for any curry leftovers. Seeing that there were some, he heats them up and makes coffee for two while he waits for it to finish. The raven-haired boy found himself studying Akechi discreetly while he mixed the coffee, the only sound that could be heard was the stirring of a spoon in a cup. Other than that, neither of them spoke a word. 

Morgana comes down from upstairs and wordlessly glances at Akira. Before Akechi left, he had already let him know his answer as well as asked the cat earlier if Akechi was allowed to stay the night, considering he even agreed to it. Morgana was hesitant about it but eventually agreed. He probably knew it was the least he could do ever since Maruki dropped the bomb of Akechi being possibly not… here. Morgana saunters over to the door, patiently waiting for Akira to open it for him. He walks to the entrance, opening it slightly ajar. Morgana looked like he was about to leave before turning to Akira, beckoning him down to his level.

"Hey, is this really a good idea?" Morgana whispers to him.

"What? He's not dangerous, he already said he would help us―"

"No, I meant is this a good idea for _you?_ " He takes a quick glance at Akechi. "I know you wanted him here, in this world, but Akechi doesn't seem to agree. Having you two alone now, I don't know if it'll really help you. In fact, it might just make this even more painful. I know how much he means to you, after all."

Akira was quiet, mulling over his words. Morgana was right, it was probably going to be harder to go through with the decision if he spent more time with Akechi. But he didn't want to let him go just yet. If he did, he'd never get the chance to talk to him as is.

"I… won't change my mind about the decision. This is just for myself. Like having closure or something." He slowly said. "I really need this, Morgana. Please."

"Hey, I already said it was okay. I'm just worried about you." Morgana laid a paw on his hand, in comfort. "You do what you need to, alright? But just take it easy. Our fight is tomorrow, after all. I'll be at Ann's tonight but I'll be back in the morning."

Akira pats Morgana's head gently. "Thank you, Morgana."

The cat turns his head away, as if in embarrassment. "Wh-What are you thanking me for? I haven't even done anything. Geez, you better sleep early tonight or I'll haunt you in your dreams!"

Akira chuckled before retreating his hand away. "I will, I will."

Morgana huffed in approval before walking off into the night. Akira watched him turn the corner and closed the door. He faced the cafe, with Akechi still in the same position as before. He walked over behind the counter and continued to stir the coffee.

Somehow, it felt like they were both waiting for something to happen, for the other to do something first. They were very conscious of the other's presence as if they were a bomb waiting to tick. Come to think of it, it had been a long while since the two had a moment like this, especially after Shido's palace… Even after reuniting during Christmas and again after the new year, their conversation was urgent and any questions about Akechi's presence or about what happened then was briefly dismissed. During the two months Akira spent in Maruki's reality, he had so much doubt about everything, especially regarding Akechi. Every time he visited him in Kichijoji, he would dismiss him, telling him to use his time to prepare instead of wasting his time on "brainless sentimentality". Whatever that entailed.

He didn't want to admit it but perhaps it felt like the detective was actually avoiding him. Although, something about it rubbed him the wrong way. Maybe it was because he knew that Akechi was most definitely not the type to run away from things. After all, he did say he'd rather face the bitter truth than live in ignorance… But if that's the case, why couldn't he just talk to him then? Why was he trying so hard to put up this cold front and push him away?

"Here. Careful, it's hot." Akira placed the freshly made coffee and curry in front of the detective. It took the detective a while to come to, causing Akira to believe that he might have actually taken a short nap.

"Thanks." Akechi mumbles, grabbing the cup of coffee first. 

He blows twice before sniffing the coffee and then taking a careful sip. Akira doesn't know when he remembered Akechi's tiny ritual but he feels embarrassed regardless. It mostly comes from the fact that he's unconsciously watched him every time he's made coffee for him. He loved seeing the detective's reactions to each new taste of the coffee he poured out for him, wondering how he could make it more to his liking. It looked like this would have been the last time he'll ever be able to make him his cup. He wondered, was this enough for him?

Akira turned away, pushing his own bowl of curry and coffee on the spot beside Akechi's. He goes around the counter and hangs his blue coat behind his stool. When he sits down, he suddenly goes stiff, all too aware of their close proximity. It wasn't the first time that they had sat so close together and he supposed it was most likely the last… It was just, for the first time, Akira felt nervous. He was afraid of the silence but he was also afraid of what would come after it and he couldn't decide which one he'd rather face.

The only thing that could be heard was the clinking of cutlery with plates. They ate in a tense silence which was uncomfortable at best. But Akira didn't want it to end like this.

"The curry." Akechi says, out of the blue. Akira almost jumps from the suddenness of it. "It's good. Really."

"Thanks, Sojiro will appreciate that." Akira swallows, sneaking a peek at Akechi who was busy staring at his bowl. "Just so you know, the secret ingredient is love."

Akechi almost chokes on his food. "Are you trying to kill me?"

"No, but it looks like you're dead set on doing it yourself."

He shuts his mouth at that, downing a sip of his coffee. Maybe Akira shouldn't have said anything but he really couldn't help it. He just felt so terribly… bitter. And he wanted Akechi to know just how much this meant to him. How much it was hurting him.

"You know, It's not like I asked to die." Akechi's voice was quiet, seething almost. "Last time I checked, I had a murderous cognitive self-shooting me point-blank."

"I know. _I know._ " Akira sighed, frustrated. "It's just―I'm sorry. I didn't mean that."

"Then, what the hell did you mean?" He faced Akira, slamming his chopsticks down. "Why am I here, Akira? Did you really ask me to stay just so you can get worked up over me? Quit being so damn passive-aggressive and spit it out already."

Akira couldn't take it anymore. "No, why are you the one so worked up? You've been nothing but ruthless ever since the talk with Maruki earlier and you won't even let me consider the option of―of letting you live? Why are you pushing me away? I know it's part of the deal but it's justーit feels as if none of this is fair. I want to respect your wishes so badly― _believe me_ , I do―but what about my wish? What about _you_?"

Akechi slaps him so hard that the force of it knocks Akira off his stool, landing on his behind. That'll definitely bruise. The detective gets on top of him and just as it looked like he was about to punch him, he brings his fist down on the floor, his head hanging low.

"FUCK!" Akechi yelled the loudest he's ever heard him. "Goddamnit! Just _why_ the fuck are you so persistent?! Do you think I don't know this isn't fair? Do you think I want to die? Of course, if―if I could be happy I would but it would come from me. From my own hands, not whatever the hell Maruki concocted for me. Not _this."_

"I know―"

"No, you don't know. You don't get it, Akira. Your wish was―It was for me to be here. But that's not what I want either."

"But what's so wrong about that?" Akira grabbed Akechi's wrists which were now shaking. "Tell me, what's so wrong with wanting you here? You're trying so hard to play the bad guy, to make sure I would regret it if I ever chose to stay in this reality. I don't want to live in blissful ignorance either but for once―once in your goddamn life―can you _please_ be honest with me?"

"I have been honest! I―"

"No, you don't hate me, Akechi. Maybe you did once, but not now. It's as Maruki said anyway… he said he didn't see any hatred or ill will between us."

When Akechi doesn't interject, Akira keeps going. "It's exactly as he said. I don't hate you, you know? I'm not scared of you either. But I sure as hell am scared of losing you, naive as you might think it is. And I'm not dumb, I'm going to hold you accountable for your past actions, for all those mental shutdown victims, for trying to kill me... But Akechi, can you please be honest with me at least? Can you tell me what you really want?"

There was a short silence as Akechi was left to brood over his words. Akira was starting to have doubts if asking him to stay was such a good idea. When he finally spoke though, his voice sounded defeated and he still refused to lift his face. "...What the hell am I supposed to do though? I've already told you, I don't want to keep living in the palm of someone's hand―no, I refuse to. I'm just so, _so_ very tired of that."

Then he goes quiet, his breath heaving. Akira doesn't dare breathe if it would ruin the moment.

"I just―" Akechi shakes his head. "You think it'll be all sunshine and rainbows if I even show my face in the real world? I still have consequences to face, reparations to pay. Who knows how long my sentence would be? You'll never see me again."

"But at least you'd still be alive." It was just a whisper but it made Akechi go still. "Akechi… You―you are still alive, right? You're really here? I mean, you're _here._ I can feel you. I can touch you." Akira slowly places a hand against Akechi's cheek, which was warm to the touch. The detective doesn't shy away from it.

When the brunette finally looks up at him, his eyes are tired. It looked like he was holding back tears. Akira wished he would have just let them fall. He would have gladly wiped them away for him.

"Akira, you're not killing me you know. I was already dead, to begin with." Akechi says, his voice groggy. "You're just letting me go."

Akira shakes his head, trying to hold back tears. "No, no…"

"Stop trying to fight it." It was his turn to hold Akira's face, who was trying to squirm away from his touch. "You can't run away from this, Akira. If you do, then what was everything you've done up till now for? All those changes of hearts, your irritatingly ingenious plan to outsmart me, and Jesus Akira, you defeated a God apparently? You can't throw all that away just for me. I'll kill you if you do, I swear."

"But I can. You asked me before if I would throw away my teammates just to join you. I'm seriously considering it now."

Akechi just laughed dryly. "You're such a bad liar. Stop trying to please me, it's irritating. And we all know you care about your friends too much to throw them under the bus."

"Well then too bad because that includes you, too," Akira exclaimed. "We're friends, Akechi. Right?"

When Akechi doesn't answer, Akira shakes his shoulders slightly. "Right?"

"For fuck's sake, Akira, why are you―" Akechi stopped to sigh in frustration. "That doesn't matter! Why can't you just accept the fact that I'm dead already?!"

Akira doesn't say anything back. In fact, the boy starts shaking. When Akechi braces himself for any retaliation, none came. He takes a peek at the raven-haired boy to see that he's actually crying.

"I'm sorry… I don't know. I don't know why I'm giving you such a hard time. I know what the right thing to do is but I still find myself wishing there was a better way―" Akira heaved, his voice cracking. "―A way to make you stay."

The detective goes still, unsure of what to do. He holds Akira's hand, hoping his presence would bring him at least some comfort. But he knew it was no use. What else could he do though? Intimacy was something vastly foreign to him; it felt strange to do. Almost alien. Akechi had never been given the opportunity to give someone comfort nor was it ever reciprocated back. He never thought he'd ever witness someone break down because of him. 

For the first time in his life, someone was actually afraid to lose him. At this moment, he wasn't being treated as disposable trash or just a forgotten afterthought. Akira actually saw through him for who he was and he wanted him, despite it all.

Slowly, Akechi wraps his arms around Akira, trying to contain his shaking. Akira hugs him harder, squeezing him, afraid that he would disappear if he didn't hold him tight enough. It almost made it harder to breathe but Akechi was too focused on what to do. His mind was racing and hearing the leader of the Phantom Thieves weeping on his shoulder made his heart clench. All of a sudden, he too, thought that he would start crying at any moment. He wanted to tell him something, anything, but he knew they would all just sound like empty promises.

Ah, why couldn't he have this sooner? Why was it that they were doomed to meet a year too late? If only he had met Akira a little earlier, maybe then none of this would have to happen… Maybe he wouldn't be so keen on exacting revenge on Shido and instead be focused on something else. Perhaps with Akira, he'd be more like a normal teenager, destined to spend his days in school and doing things more like his age. He wouldn't have to worry about working under Shido or smiling on tv or the mental shutdowns… he could just be himself. He wouldn't know exactly what that meant but he had his whole life to figure just that out.

But try as he might, it wouldn't change the fact that he worked hard to get to where he is now, even if it led to his death. Akechi truly didn't regret any of his past decisions because they were his. Nobody could ever take them away from him. He was ready for the consequences that would come for him the moment he first pulled the trigger. Up till now, he had never thought twice of his past decisions until Akira walked into his life. Every encounter he's had with him had filled him with so much joy he knew he never had.

Of course, such joy came with an equal amount of guilt. 

Akechi had never felt more conflicted. The more he spent time with him, the more he found himself hating the fact that he was beginning to lose his conviction. He couldn't even recall the exact moment he would begin to use Akira as a reminder of what he had to do. Any unnecessary emotions were forcefully locked away, somewhere, deep in his heart. It was only now that he realized all of it was hopeless anyway. In his entire life, Akira was the only one who could ever cause him to sway his justice.

He was his biggest what if.

Akira couldn't care less about how he looked to the detective anymore. All of his walls were down and behind the cool and witty leader mask he constantly had on, there was only just vulnerability left. At this moment, he was nothing more than a lonely, touch starved teenager. 

If only they had met earlier. 

If only he had more time to save him. 

If only. 

If only…

He repeated the words over and over until it didn't even sound like words anymore. Akira buried his face deeper into the nook of Akechi's neck, wondering how much longer this could go on. His tears seemed to show no signs of stopping. He tried to muffle his own sobs but it would escape anyway. Akira had never in his life cried like this before. 

Deeper and deeper still.

Somewhere in the midst of the moment, the two imagined a life with the other, one where they were all the happier. Akira thought that if he wished hard enough, maybe the moment wouldn't have to end at all. That he could just stay in Akechi's arms forever. But he knew it was just wishful thinking. Sometime soon, one of them will have to let go and Akira wasn't sure he wanted to be the first to do so.

...

Once Akira had calmed down and they had separated, the two of them wordlessly finished their curry. Akira had finished first and gone up the stairs, leaving Akechi downstairs to wash both their dishes. By then, it was only about nine in the evening. Akira was sitting on the side of the bed, massaging his possibly bruised cheek. He heard Akechi come up the stairs, a glass of water in his hand.

"You might've overdone it," Akira asked, his voice a bit hoarse. He clears his throat, embarrassed.

Akechi raises an eyebrow and casually passes him the glass―which was touching―and so Akira thanks him for it. "I think it was perfectly appropriate. You deserved it, after all."

Akira lets out a sigh of relief after downing the water, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. "You're right."

Akechi brushes his hand over his left cheek, the slight touch tickled Akira. He held his breath, daring himself to go still. His eyes brushed over Akechi's gloved knuckles and remembered that he had punched the ground earlier after slapping him.

"Hey, is your hand okay?" Akira grasped Akechi's hand gently, rubbing his thumb over the back of his hand which prompted a small flinch from the detective. "You're hurt, aren't you?"

Akechi pulled his hand away. "Don't be ridiculous."

"Sit down or the deal is off."

"Akira, seriously, I'm fine. Don't use the deal to―"

"Just shut up and let me bandage you, goddamnit."

Akechi gets taken aback and then sighs, obediently sitting down beside Akira on his bed. Akira stands up and finds his mini first aid kit on his work desk which was something he bought in the beginning when they first infiltrated Kamoshida's Palace. After getting their asses kicked by the shadows there, he realized a simple kit like this wasn't going to help them in the least. Since then, he'd left it alone as is, busy collecting dust on his desk.

He sits down on the ground in front of Akechi, pulling the kit open. Akechi takes off his right glove, albeit a bit slowly, probably due to the pain. As expected, his knuckles were bruised red with blood.

Akira poured rubbing alcohol on a towel, making sure to get it soaked well. "This is going to hurt."

"I can handle―"

Akira placed it over Akechi's right hand which caused him to suck in a breath. His pretty face twisted in pain.

"Not so tough now, are you?"

"You're such an asshole."

Akira smiled to himself in satisfaction before gently dabbing his hand. The detective's face relaxes, breathing a small sigh of relief. He brushes the blood away until his knuckles were left with just a harsh red. Akira doesn't think he's ever seen the detective's bare hand before. He supposed there was that time in the bathhouse they went to together before but he wasn't really paying attention to it then. Besides, he was mostly focused on trying to look at anywhere but a half-naked Akechi because how was it even possible that a dude was that pretty? Regardless, his hand was surprisingly slender and smooth, not at all what he would have imagined. He thought he was using the gloves to hide any possible scars but there wasn't anything like that at all.

Akechi's hands shift a bit, snapping Akira out of his thoughts. He takes out a large bandaid and gently places it on his knuckle.

"There, all done." Akira slowly pulls away from his hand.

"Thank you." Akechi quietly says. "Okay, your turn to sit down now."

"What?" He gets up, holding the first aid kit. "Oh, are you thinking about my cheek? It's not as bad as yours, it's not like it's bleeding or―"

"Sit down, Akira."

Akira obediently sits down as Akechi takes the box from him. He opens the kit and takes out a large bandaid. Akechi then turns to face him, his hand gently caressing his cheek. Akira could feel the heat of his gaze and quietly gulped to himself, trying to look anywhere but him. Somehow, he caught himself staring at Akechi's lips and turned away before he could notice, embarrassed. This was just like the bathhouse except if he was fully clothed but reaching the limit of his personal space. His face was just so unnecessarily close; he didn't need to be this close just to check his cheek, did he?

At some point, Akechi's thumb trailed down to Akira's lips. He was thumbing over it gently. Akira doesn't think the slap even hit his mouth so he wasn't really sure why he was tracing over it. His touch tickled his lips as if a dozen small kisses were planted on them every time he so much as brushed against it.

Somehow, it felt like time was slowed down just for this moment. It was just putting a bandaid on but it felt so _deliberate_ on Akechi's part anyway, as if he was really taking his time with it. Akira wanted him to hurry up and stick it on already but another part of him wished this moment would never end, just like the hug. His heart was beating as he remembered how close the two were earlier. He smelled like coffee and curry then, which he could actually catch a whiff of right now.

When, finally, he put on the bandaid, only then did Akechi pull away. His warm presence dissipated, leaving behind just a ghost of himself. He got up and put away the first aid kit on Akira's desk. Akira found himself exhaling a breath of relief he didn't know he was holding.

"Do you have a change of clothes I can borrow?" Akechi finally said, his back still turned to Akira.

"Yeah, um, give me a sec. I'll pull it out for you." Akira stumbles over to his box of clothes and takes out a spare long-sleeved shirt and pajama bottoms that were too long for him. "Here, the pants are kind of too big for me but it might fit you."

Akechi finally turns around and takes the clothes from him. "Alright."

He goes downstairs, promptly locking himself in the washroom. Akira sighs and looks for the spare blanket and pillow that Yusuke once used when he slept over. He carefully laid it out on the couch, neatly folding the blanket on top before realizing he was going to use it anyway.

By the time Akechi was done, Akira was already sitting on the bed, patiently waiting for him. The clothes did fit Akechi, to a T. He's never seen the boy in pajamas before―or anything other than his uniform or coat―but it suited him well. The detective looked more aloof than usual without his typical get-up.

He placed his clothes on top of the table near the stairs and turned around to face Akira. "Well."

Akira nodded once.

Akechi sat down on the couch, which bounced back a little. They sat there in silence for a few moments, each brooding in their own share of thoughts.

"Um," Akechi started. "I never got the chance to thank you for changing Shido's heart. You have my gratitude for that."

"Oh, no problem."

"But that doesn't mean I owe you. In fact, you're the one who owes me. For taking my chance at revenge."

Akira chuckled at that. "I sure owe you a lot of things. We still have that duel to do, come to think of it."

"I haven't forgotten," Akechi replied, folding his gloveless hands together. "You still have that glove right? You better not lose it, I'm not giving you another one."

Right, his black glove. Of course, he hadn't forgotten. Ever since that day, he's kept it in his jeans pocket for safekeeping. "Of course, I'll take good care of it for you. I'm not running away from the deal so you better not run from the duel either."

"What do you take me for? I'm not a coward."

"Believe me, I know." Akira chuckled and then sighed. "I know."

Akechi just stared at Akira in curiosity before looking away, settling into the couch. "I'm going to bed."

"Okay," Akira said, half disappointed. 

He gets up and turns off the light switch before jumping into his bed. By the time he's all settled, Akechi was already under his blanket, facing the back of the couch.

"Goodnight, Akechi," Akira says.

"... Goodnight, Akira." Akechi says back.

...

All night, Akira found himself staring at Akechi's back, hoping he would turn around to face his way. He thought that if he would do it at least once, he wouldn't hesitate then to tell him how he felt. But he doesn't think he ever did, turn around.

"Akechi, I..." he whispered, trailing off.

When Akira awoke the next morning, Akechi was already long gone. The only indication that last night wasn't a dream was the slight crease on the couch as well as the neatly folded blanket and tucked pillow he lent him, his borrowed clothes left ontop. Walking closer, Akira knelt near the couch and touched the space that Akechi slept on. It was still warm.

Akira suddenly felt the urge to cry, again. He felt like he was pouring his soul out for the space he left behind. There was just so much left unsaid, so much more he could have done for him. This last night he had alone with him would linger with Akira forever, and he was left to wonder if everything was ever enough, if Akechi was ever happy once. That all those times he had spent with the Phantom Thieves and Akira wasn't just some mere farce he had to maintain. That his bitter rivalry with him wasn't all purely made just out of hate. He wonders himself if he'll always have to feel like this, left behind in the wake of Akechi's shadow, forever reminiscing all the days before today. 

Akira wonders why fate was so cruel as to let a boy suffer so much and then take him away so soon before he could ever truly grasp his happiness. 

When Morgana came back that morning, he found Akira weeping on the couch, holding the clothes Akechi wore last night. It still smelled of coffee and curry. 

Morgana tried to calm him down, patting Akira's back. By the time he settled down, Morgana asked him about the bandaid on his cheek. Akira told him about their argument last night, and how Akechi had snapped on him. He told him about how they both took their time in bandaging each other. As he recalled that time, for some reason, his cheek no longer seemed to ache and when Akira took off the bandaid to check, there was no visible bruise anymore, as if nothing ever happened.

"Must be the Actualization," Morgana commented. "You know how Maruki's trying to make everyone safe and happy? Maybe it can't stop a slap yet but it can heal small wounds or something."

Akira doesn't know how much of that was true but he suddenly feels angry that he just willingly erased his bruise from him. As strange enough as it is, that was his bruise to take as the consequence of provoking Akechi. He wasn't allowed to just erase that from him, making it so that nothing ever happened. 

Because it did happen. 

That moment was always going to stay with him for as long as he lived and Akechi was going to live on in him for as long as he loved him.

"That's pretty messed up of him, to just heal you like that. Knowing you, you probably earned that slap," Morgana said, hopping onto Akira's lap. 

"I sure did." Akira sighed, sniffing a bit. His eyes were most likely swollen red from crying nonstop and his throat was as dry as a desert.

"Geez, you look like a mess. Come on, you need to clean up before everyone gets here. You don't want them worrying about you, do you?"

"I don't."

There was a small silence as Akira hesitated to leave the couch. He wanted to get up and clean his face but doing so would mean having to move forward…

"Hey, look," Morgana started. "You said everything you needed to last night, right? Akechi heard you loud and clear. I mean if he didn't, he wouldn't have given you a big slap across the face. You get it, right? You have to do this for him. No one else but you has to. He asked for your help because he believes in you. So you have to have faith in him, too, okay?"

Akira stared at Morgana, a realization hitting him. He was right, Akechi did believe in him. Otherwise, why else would he have appeared to him that day when he first noticed everything was wrong? He probably didn't expect to be brought back at all into a world so manipulated as it is. Akechi came to Akira because he knew he was the only one foolish enough to be so willing as to save the world again, and to save him.

"You're right. I'm sorry for being so mopey." He chuckled, rubbing the cat's back softly. "You're always so good at cheering me up. What would I do without you?"

"Yeah, yeah, you better be grateful. You'd be useless without me." Morgana huffed in satisfaction. "I'm kidding, obviously."

"No, you're right. I'm a useless human, without you." He gave Morgana a big hug, possibly suffocating the cat. "Don't leave me, too, or I'm going to die of loneliness."

"Hey, hey, stop that! Can't breathe!" The cat scratched his shirt until Akira finally let him go. "Geez, you almost killed me! And what's that about leaving? Why would I ever leave you? I'm still your mentor you know, and the lesson is over when I say it's over."

"Aw, I love you, too, Morgana."

Akira chuckled as he watched the cat turn away from embarrassment, smacking Akira with his paw.

"Anyways, you feel better now, right? We can do this, together. Just like we always have. Everyone's going to be behind you on this, Akechi especially." Morgana places a paw on Akira's hand. "So, let's take back our reality, yeah?"

"Yeah." Akira smiled down at Morgana. And for the first time in weeks, there was no more hint of hesitation in his voice. "I'm ready to face reality now."

**Author's Note:**

> hello, thanks for reaching the end!
> 
> 2/2 was probably the scene that really broke me. i just can't stop thinking about it. it has it all, drama, tension, and two boys who just desperately care about each other but don't know how to go about it.
> 
> anyways, the idea came to me after i saw Meruz's art of their alternative 2/2 scene (see here: https://meruz.tumblr.com/post/619406103197925376) and i was like, oh my god. what if there was more after? and then it was downhill from there.
> 
> some of the dialogue lines was taken from an unused cutscene from Akechi's third awakening happening in a Jazz Club of all things! it's not as good as the final version but it still hits hard.
> 
> anyways, this was pretty long. sorry about that. thanks again for reading and here's to hoping i'll finally stop crying over 2/2. (probably not.) take care!


End file.
